Vent

First, my last BF was matched to me on eharmony yesterday. After we broke up 2 years ago, he was matched to me on Match.com also. Umm, clearly we MATCH. For those just catching up, he broke up with me. I’d call that motherfucker a bastard, except that he’s actually a pretty great guy. Bastard. So we haven’t spoken since we last saw each other at the airport after returning from a lovely vacation to the Domincan Republic. He broke up with me 5 days before we left, but the vacation was nice anyway. I don’t miss vacation for anything. The last time we traded an email was just a few days later which ended with him telling me that he hopes that I can appreciate how hard this is for him, and that he can’t see me but we’ll catch up from time to time. Time to time? Talk about giving me the double bird…

ANYwho, cut to two years later and his message has a subject of “It was only a matter of time…” That’s what it said. Inside he said hi and asked how I am…how is my job…take care. Sooooooooo, what the hell is that? What’s just a matter of time? That we write bc we are constantly matched? That he realizes he was a fucking retard (not nice to say retard, geez). Just a matter of time that what? It’s amazing how we think our emotions are gone, but really they live right under the surface, you know? I sort of felt excited to hear from him, and I sort of had a stomach ache. Then I sort of wanted to crush him like a grape.

I wrote back that I am fine. I left out any questions so as to convey that I don’t care if we speak again (bastard), and was like “good to hear from you”…although it would have been nice if it wasn’t TWO YEARS but whatever. Man, I guess I do harbor a little anger.

THEN I have an entirely separate issue with a friend who is in LOVE with me big time. Like really seriously…and he keeps trying to convince me of why I should be with him (VERY annoying) and says things like “I’m so sorry if my feelings for you are making you uncomfortable.” And I want to say, dude, saying shit like THAT is making me uncomfortable. I know it sounds mean to read it like this, but imagine someone constantly all over you, writing to you every morning, noon, and night...throwing themselves at you that they'll do anything you need any time EVER...AAAAND he keeps insinuating that I’m making a big mistake bc he’s right there and would do anything for me, like I am ignorant to the truth that is in front of me. I mean for christ’s sake. That just pisses me off. I’m not an idiot. I love you and we have been good friends for 20 years. I am flattered, but I don’t want to be with you. I’m not an idiot.

Funny how someone chasing you and kissing your ass makes them that much less attractive…which brings me to one more…my OTHER stupid BF, from before the one above, contacts me non-stop. The less I care to hear from him, the more he contacts me. We broke up THREE years ago almost. Je-SUS. Now he is a fucking disaster like I have never seen in my life and there is NO WAY ever ever ever EVER that I would even CONSIDER dating him again. EVER. What the fuck is wrong with these guys?

Roster of the newbies to come. I've been cultivating the crop and it's almost date time! OMG -- I just treated them like...corn or something. Lol.